Getting Back on the Arabian Horse

I only applied for one job today, not my best work. If nothing else, I feel like my applications are getting better and better. I've edited cover letters and resumes for each job and I feel I'm getting better at selling myself. But, if it is going to take one hundred and one applications I'd better start moving a little faster than one application a day.

I feel in some ways I've become like a stock character on a television show. The twenty-something who moved back home and is kind of worthless. I sit around and read and watch TV and eat jelly beans from a four-pound container. Then my mom asks about the orange juice and I say "Oh, I drank it all." This is not me at my most likable. I don't even have a good excuse. The story I am reading in One Thousand and One Nights involves a man who is stone from the waist down and a lake with magical fish. I'm not yet sure how these two things are linked. Scherzade got distracted and I had to read another story about a cheating wife. In the ancient Middle East if a man does it it is called a Harem, if a woman does it is called debauchery. These people really could have used a little feminism in their lives. But, this is my original point: until I find myself half made of stone there is no reason for me to be a worthless slug.

I didn't get this worthless all at once, it happened over time. One day I hung out in sweats all day, the next day I didn't take a shower. This progressed to a point where I had to take a shower before working out because I felt too dirty to work out. That one was a personal low. I was not this way at all in college. I was hard-working girl between school, volunteering, my job and other activities. I think my life needs a little more structure. A good place to start is jeans. Real denim ones, not those new pajama jeans. Tomorrow I am going to get up and put on real clothes. Then I am going to find something productive to do. So shall it be written, so shall it be done.